Walk Tall

When something happens that is unplanned, how do you adjust to it? People with positive energy and an optimistic outlook will face it head on, make a plan to remedy it and move on. That is what I have done in the last few weeks and it feels good. I used to wait around for my 3 bad things to happen and then realize I will be back to normal. Now I focus on the positive of the situation, because there always is something positive and once again, move forward. I believe that if you let negative things fester, they breed. They breed bad energy and multiply like Gremlins. If you refuse to allow it and focus on a way around, through and over the situation things will change for the better and strength and tolerance will prevail. Walk tall, walk smart and walk happy.

Being the Ball

When it comes to looking for the right relationship I tend to find that I have a big heart. Having a big heart is a good thing but it also lends me to be too soft hearted when it comes to guys. Everyone has expectations of the type of relationship they want, although sometimes we tend to lower our expectations. Well through recent failed dating experiments I will no longer lower my expectations. I think not only is that fair to me, but also to my potential dates. So in that case why do guys say that girls are "too picky" and girls express that we need to be "more picky" when it comes to dating? I think it's because we all have and ideal image of who we want a relationship with and instead of holding out we attempt to try someone less than our ideal image. In my mind that is a good thing because that person may surprise you and be the one. Well in my case, na lets not get into it. I just have to admit there are more losses than wins(enter sigh now). So I have devised a new approach to dating, not a complete documented theory but a few new stepping stones. Through advice of friends and family, I will be picky and keep my eye on the prize. To empower my friends and family I tend to use the phrase "be the ball", now I think it's my turn to "be the ball"(enter chuckle now). I am in a new city with lots of options, why not focus on exactly what I am looking for and not settle for less? In reality I think it is easier said than done. But on the other hand it gives me the excuse to go shopping for new clothes for a new dating adventure.

Vision

Life can be so amazing if you keep your eyes open. Not only keeping your eyes open but having a panoramic view so you can see all that it offers. We are so use to walking through life with blinders on, making judgements about things and people we don't have a clear view of. Is it safer to view that way? Do we want to shield ourselves from the unknown? If so, than why? All I know is that I see in panoramic now and soak it all in. I no longer will judge unfairly and early. I intend to give everyone and every opportunity to show itself to me and embrace all it has to offer. "Don't judge a book by its cover", why would you when there is so much inside the bindings and the outer layer. See with in open mind, feel with an open heart and touch with embracing hands. Aloha

Happiness

The smell of my daughters breathe while she sleeps, the ruffles in the ocean while I lay beside it, the sound of children laughing while they play. To define happiness you have to look within yourself, because happiness is an emotion defined truly by an individual. What makes me happy may not always be tangible like a new pair or red 4in heels or a brand new shiny Kathy Van Zeeland handbag. My happiness stems from what my daughter does, says, laughs, dances when she hears her favorite song or even the look she gives me when she talks to me. I am also happy when I am surrounded by food, whether it's at a restaurant, a small intimate setting or if I am at the beach with friends and everyone has brought their favorite dish, the feeling is amazing. Making someone else happy or even yourself happy is very important in life. Also be grateful for what you have that makes you happy and be thankful for it. Take a moment today and write out what makes you happy in your life. Once you have finished, read over it and smiled, say out loud how you are thankful for it all; do not be sad for what you don't have, but content that you are blessed with things to make your life a joy.

Crumbs

This blog is inspired by a post my friend put on her Facebook page. I won't say who it is but I will quote her. "I DESERVE...", if you look at the two words over and over again it really makes you think. What do I DESERVE? Of course everyone in their mind has their perfect answer, but to see the comments left on her post, it all makes sense. My friend who wrote that post deserves everything in this world that is wonderful. She deserves everything that she dreams of, works hard for and desires, why shouldn't she? Shouldn't everyone get what they deserve? Or should people settle with crumbs? I think everyone knows what I am talking about, crumbs, left overs, less than the best, the bottom of the barrel.

I recently without many people knowing pursued a guy who in actuality had nothing to offer me that was genuine. He wasn't willing to think of someones feeling other than himself, monopolized our conversations and wasn't willing to give, but was a willing taker. Being blinded by the physical, trying to compromise on what my needs and desires are, I forgot about what I truly deserved. When I finally got my head out of the clouds I realized, I don't deserve someone degrading me and talking down to me like I am less of a person or not respecting what I have to say or decisions that I make. I don't deserve someone that talks about themselves all the time and doesn't take the time out to realize that I am a wonderful person inside and out. DO I DESERVE THAT! Nope and neither does anyone else. Those are crumbs. I deserve someone who will listen to me without interrupting and someone who asks "what can I do for you?" So my beautiful friend with such a big heart and positive spirit, I send this out to you and all the woman who have so much to offer and share, don't settle for crumbs because you deserve nothing less than the world.

Winds of Change

If you've read the book or seen the movie "The Secret", you might have heard the phrase "Laws of Attraction." Laws of Attraction may be interpreted in many ways due to an individuals perception. I actually use that phrase to help empower my friends and myself to change the course of our vision on life or the moment. My perception of the Laws of Attraction is that sub consciously we send off emotions that are negative or that don't correlate with what we are showing; sometimes though we may appear happy or content inside, we are not. The Secrets theory on "The Laws of Attraction" is what signals you send out in good conscience, are what you want to come to you. For example, losing a job, although very devastating for one person may be a blessing for another person. The loss of ones job now allows them to focus on another career path they might not have seen if they stayed at their former job. That is just the beginning, you have to believe mental and physically in what you want. By putting out positive energy in the way you react with people and purging the negative that might have surrounded you and your course, you send out signals. Signals that will influence other likes and desires like your own. If you want a particular job and you know that you are qualified and the right person for that job, be the job. Eat, Sleep and Dream that job; send out those positive mind, body and soul images to the world and show your dedication to what you truly want and deserve. You have to remain strong, positive and focused on your life goals and don't except anything less. If something crosses your path and it is not what you envision as a mainstay, get rid of it, because it might alter you L.O.A. toward a negative, less fulfilling and more challenging path. If you want the ball you have to be the ball! We as people were not created to be unhappy or without; we are given these obstacles in life to show ourselves that with love, hard work, mental and emotional strength we can change our course in life.

To Give than to Receive

It's the age old question, is it better to give than to receive? Well I believe it is a matter of perception, actually that's not true. I firmly believe that it is better to give than to receive.

There are people in this world that are constantly giving, whether it be tangible items, services, or emotions. These people give, give, give and don't request anything in exchange. They basically give for self fulfillment. I watched a YouTube video on a guy who traveled around the world giving hugs for free. He would stand in the streets with a cardboard sign that said "Free Hugs". As you would think, some people gave him the stink eye, some people passed him by and some people actually stopped and accepted his free hug. Now is it so hard to accept a free hug from someone so giving? What about people that would give you water if you are thirsty, come fill your gas tank if it's empty, call you and ask you out to a movie and they pay.

Those are givers that are satisfied just by doing something out of their hearts for someone else.

On the other hand, there are the takers. People who ask, take, demand and want without any desire to return the favor. Those people take advantage of the givers and are very selfish. The receivers that take advantage of givers sometimes don't realize they are doing it, so my co-worker told me. Do these people think they are entitled?

However the act of giving is such a strong gesture and should be received with a kind heart and a show of gratitude, something so simple as a thank you or a return of the favor. If you return the favor, make sure it is a sign from your heart;because when the giver is making an offer to you, you can bet it is from their heart. So ask yourself, better yet, monitor yourself and see if you give more than you receive. I believe that everyday, at least once a day everyone should do one selfless act. If you see someone that dropped something pick it up for them, if someone asks you for directions, instead of point, show them; if someone just needs a hug, hug them and if someone looks like they are down, tell them something to make them smile. Lead by example and be a giver!